How my life is
by Egyptian Princess of 1290 bc
Summary: Just Brennan's thoughts after Booth lets her know something. ONESHOT! PLS R


**Disclaimer: I don't own Bones. If I did they would have done what David and Emily said on the commentary to "Two bodies in the Lab" "ripped each other's clothes off and screwed up against a wall."**

**Ha-ha, I love that commentary, so funny. Ok, please read, just something I came up with one morning at 12:15am. It's raining, dark, and I can feel the coffee wearing off so please tell me what you think. If it doesn't make sense please let me know. Thank you all for everything. So long and good night.**

My name is Dr. Temperance Brennan, and I am in love with my partner Special Agent Seeley Booth. Ok, there I said it is everybody happy now? My god, people just need to get off of my back, especially Angela. She's always going on about how madly in love with him I am and how I should just one day jump him and screw him senseless. Does nobody understand he's just my friend?

I mean I must admit; he's just my friend. We spend time together, but hey when my brother was around I spent time with him as well. Sure I feel funny when I'm around him, but Sully made me feel the same way and by sleeping with him, well it proved to be nothing more than a good time…for a while. Then we broke up and here I am again sitting at my desk working over numerous reports.

I sit here, looking over the files, but nothing makes sense and I'm left wondering, what if Angela is right? What if I'm meant to find happiness with Booth? I quickly push that thought aside. I don't love anybody, I don't trust anybody. My brother took all hopes of that returning with him as he drove away and out of my life with my father again. My need to regain the past was taken away as well as my father handcuffed me to the bench, where I was left to sit talking to Booth until a few agents came with keys to let me loose.

Thought I must admit if there ever was some sign of hope of me ever really being ok, in the end, I know for a fact Booth would be the one to make it that way. Because, like I said, he is my friend and gives me the feeling that everything will be ok and that no matter what we will catch the bad guy. Even now that my father is the bad guy, he promises that we will catch him, even though he sides with him, somewhat.

"I'd take a stand up crook over a crooked cop any day." He told me that to my face, though I still don't understand it. He also told me that in my father's world what he's doing is right, but I fail to see how two worlds exist. There is only one and in this one world what he did was wrong. Angela pointed out they were psychological worlds. I hate psychology.

I guess the only way I can ever began healing is when I feel open and ready enough, by that time I should be forty, so I have at least another nine years to get on track. But what happens then? I don't want kids, I'd be opening the chance for me to make the same mistake my parents made, especially with my job, so many people want me dead. I don't want to be married, that's hell in its own way.

I guess that when the time comes I will do just what Angela tells me to do; I'll give Booth a try, see if he's willing to take a small chance on me. But then again I don't expect him to wait until we're forty for this either.

I'm not really sure where I'm going with this. I guess I'm just really confused about what had just happened. Booth came into my office, like every other day and he came up to me and told me how he felt about me. He likes me, and I'm not talking likes, he said he could possibly love me. Now here I am sitting at my desk I feel that if I yell to the world I love him. That

Maybe everyone will be quite for a moment and I could think so I yell it now.

I'M IN LOVE WITH MY PARTNER SPEICAL AGENT SEELEY BOOTH!

There, but as I reveal this, the world still talks, still tells me everything I want to be silent. I guess it only works if the world hears me and I don't sit here and yell it in my mind hoping the world catches on. I can't expect him to wait for me forever and he has been there for me when I needed him the most and the least. I've never been more confused in my entire life.

I must admit, he's the only one I feel safe around, I trust him with my life, I guess, as much as I hate to admit it, I have faith in him. He'd never let harm come to me, and if it slid right behind him and got to me anyways he'd do all he could just to get justice for me.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this and in my head I'm still confused, I know that for this brief moment I must turn my thoughts off and allow my mending heart to speak, for it has been a long while since it last spoke. Somewhere in me I find the strength and push my chair away from my desk hoping he hasn't got too far. I catch him just inches form the door and call his name, as he turns and faces me, the look on his face breaks my heart, but not because of what he did to me, for he's done nothing wrong, but for the pain I've cause him and this is why I feel twice as better for doing what I am.

My arms wrapped around his neck as I place a gentle kiss on his lips, hoping he won't push me away. Thank god he doesn't. His arms wrap around my waist and pull me closer to him, intensifying the kiss in the process and weakening my knees. I've never felt a kiss do this to me before and know that he is the only one to make me feel this way.

He is the only one who knows my heart will take a while to mend and is willing to spend every second trying to help it along the way, no matter how long it takes. He is the only one who understands my past as much as I do and promises to do the best to make it right.

Well I said it once and I'll say it again, I'm in love with my partner Special Agent Seeley Booth. Now will the world get off of my back? I've admitted it and I mean it. Every bit of it, I'm in love with him. I spend my free time with him, I feel funny when I'm around him and that is how I know I'm in love. And if for any reason I feel he doesn't feel the same I just remember he will always be my friend no matter what.

He respects my wishes of no children and by which I respect his wishes of a marriage, which will take place sometime in the spring. I'll even adopt Parker as my son, so long as it's ok with Rebecca. Ok, I've changed a lot for him, but he's done the same for me, he taught me how to love and I'm willing to spend the rest of my life paying him back.


End file.
